Cram-Man Begins..

The following text is an example of an imaginary conversation that happens during exams, between the good and the evil halves of every normal engineering student’s mind.


NOTE: This has been hugely inspired by “The Dark Knight” and “Batman Begins”. Watching these will help in better comprehension of the dialogue.


Key: VTU – A university named after one of the best engineers India has ever produced.

Tanenbaum, Ayala : Authors of textbooks which we usually fail to comprehend.



This is what happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object…


Encounter 1:

The Joker: Now there’s a Cram-man.

The Cram-man: Constitution and professional ethics.? I’ve seen now what I would have to become to study subjects like these.

The Joker: Ahaha-Aha-Ee-Ooh-Aha, And I thought my jokes were bad. Madness is like gravity, all it needs is a little push..! How about watching another season of “Friends”?

Cram Man finishes watching a full season of Friends.

The Joker: Ta-da.. The day’s gone…!

Encounter 2:

CM: 5 days for Microcontroller 8051? I guess one day should be more than enough as I am already exposed to the antics of 8085 and 8086. I can take down Ayala single handedly..

Joker: AH-A-AHAA-A.. Lets not blow this out of proportion.. This book deserves a better class of student and you are going to give it to him.

CM: But still, 5 days is a long break for one subject. And the exams go on for almost a month. Why can’t they finish them off in a week or two.?

Joker: Do you want to know why they have exams for this long? Days are too quick. You can’t savor all of the… little… frustrations. You see, in their… last moments before an exam, students show you what they really are capable of.

Encounter 3:

Joker: Why so serious?

CM: Computer Communication Networks. I knew VTU wouldn’t go down without a fight. But this is different. They’ve crossed the line. Only one day to cram and a whole Tanenbaum to devour. I should’ve planned my study better. How can VTU do this to me?

Joker: The lecturers have plans. VTU has plans. They’re schemers. There’s no going back. You’ve changed things. All VTU does is, introduce a little anarchy…upset the established order…and everything becomes chaos. VTU is an agent of chaos

Encounter 4:

CM: 5 days holidays for Operating Systems.. YAY…!!! Thanks to VLSI which is postponed by 20 days. Let me start off cramming my head with the “Virtual Memory” chapter.

Joker: Never start with Virtual Memory. The victim gets all fuzzy.

[After 3 hours of unsuccessful cramming]

Joker: See?

CM: What am I going to write? Anyway; it’s not what knowledge I have in me, but what I write that defines me. Some universities are not looking for anything logical, they just want to watch the world cram..

Encounter 5:

CM: I can’t believe VTU makes us study even on New Year’s Eve.! And makes us write an exam on January 1st..! Damn these exams..

Joker: It’s a funny world we live in. The only sensible way to live is without rules. Welcome to a world without rules. And tonight you’re gonna break your one rule. Tonight, you won’t study because of some misplaced sense of self-righteousness. You’ll rather celebrate New Year instead.. And VTU will not stop torturing you, because that is just too much fun..! I think you and VTU are destined to do this forever..!

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6 comments

  1. its super emo and super funny. i dont knw how u meant it to be….but its sucks that u had a exam right before new years….and most of yr techinal stuff-i dint get it.. but very very funny 😛

    all that apart – a wonderful way to write.never seen anyone write this way before 🙂

  2. There u go guys,
    as usual mister ashwin amazes us wit another slick entry…
    although twasnt very “wow amazin” kinds…twas a read worthwhile!! another brick in the wall ash…keep it going…

  3. u need to take a bow for this…… i can see the creative genius in you…… do mesmerize me more…. a mention to the dialogue writer…… 🙂

  4. i didn understand this post for a long time!!…after being thro with tanenbaum, ayala and their likes now ,and after watching “the dark knight” till vlc would no longer play it, i can only say “keep it going”..awesome!!..brilliance:) ..u can now b officially gotham’s “write knight!”:D

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